New encounters, how much time should you invest?

In a society constantly influenced by fleeting trends and first impressions, authentic connections remain key. At our recent event, we paired guests based on shared interests from our questionnaire. Our goal is to have people interact, and find an attraction that is beyond skin deep. While the first impression can spark a connection, we know for a fact that the last impression is the one that truly lingers…. Here is the story of Tony and Tamara, please note these names are fictional.

I placed Tony and Tamara next to each other. I felt that these two good looking, successful, individuals would have a great time together. Indeed, they did, their conversation flowed and both seemed very locked in to each other. Even though there were others around them, they did not deviate from one another. Finally, it came time to switch. Tony was seated next to another woman, who he also seemed to enjoy and she as well. After the 2nd course people were free to mingle with whomever they wanted. Tony kept on talking to that woman and Tamara made new friends at the bar enjoying her night out. Once I reviewed the match forms, Tony liked both women but none of them liked him back.

It is my conjecture, and mine alone, that Tony should have mingled at the bar with the others in a more inclusive way and capture an opportunity to reconnect with Tamara. I think if he showed interest at the end of the night this would have prompted her to like him back or at least give him a chance. However, after witnessing his connection with the other woman, she probably decided it would be a better idea to skip Tony all together. It is possible that it was difficult for him to exit the conversation, or maybe this woman was fascinating, but this seems unlikely since she had a match with someone else that night. Nevertheless, if you like someone you need to show interest. There is a certain amount of strategy involved at these events, you need to place your bet on the person with the higher likelihood of a real connection. Invest more time in the person that is a better fit. This is why we allow free time after the 2nd course, so you can go back and reconnect with the person you liked most, or mingle in the same group as the other person. Making a good last impression on someone is a lasting impression that will stick with them. If you did not reconnect before ending the evening, the message you are sending is “I’m not interested” a polite goodbye will not suffice. Everyone is polite and cordial but very few are “interested”. No one wants to be just another number, another swipe, or another text message. Invest your time and yourself and the results may shock you. 

Sound off in the comments, do you think I'm right about Tamara? Did she get turned off by Tony's long winded interaction with the other woman? I'm dying to know what you think.

Best,

Jenn